Standardization: The Meeting Protocol

A Guide for the Utterly Confused

Meetings are the lifeblood of productivity, or so we're told. But let's face it, folks, they can be a real grind. That's why we've developed the Standardization Protocol: a set of rules to make your meetings more efficient, more enjoyable, and less likely to induce spontaneous combustion.

The Rules:

  1. Agendas are sacrosanct. Don't even think about touching them.
  2. Everyone has an opinion, even the quiet ones. Encourage them to participate, but not too much.
  3. Decisions are made by the loudest person in the room. If that person is you, congratulations!
  4. Notes are for sycophants and the faint of heart. Just wing it, folks.
  5. Meetings can last as long as the coffee machine has coffee.

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